Five Minutes

{Bang}

The door was shut with the huge bang.

Inside the room, Mohit looked around.. Sweating profusely a sense of desperation engulfed him.

Rushing to the wood work, Mohit started scanning all the cupboards.

He threw everything.. Papers, stationeries, files, clothes until he stumbled upon what he was looking for..

MOBILE PHONE

Holding the mobile in his hand he dialed a number with a sense of relief and starting speaking..

“Hi Bharath.. How are you.. Long time since I spoke to you.. Why haven’t you called me..When are you coming down.. I want to talk lot of things… ”

He spoke continuously for five mins..

Voice at the other end said “Please check the number you have dialed…”

He again dialed a number and started speaking..

“Hi Bharath.. How are you.. Long time since I spoke to you.. Why haven’t you called me..When are you coming down.. I want to talk lot of things… ”

He spoke continuously for five mins..

Voice at the other end said “Please check the number you have dialed…”

Mohit is among the 5% of world population who have the fear of being ignored and unloved. A psychiatric condition referred to as “Autophobia” – Fear of loneliness. Though the physical well-being of the sufferers is not affected they experience undue anxiety and fear being left alone. Worst only 2% seek medical help. Medicines contain the patients but do not solve the problem. Simply put damage once done remains forever.

Imagine a world without Autophobia.. Imagine a world filled with love.. Imagine a world where no one is ignored. It is possible. It is possible only by YOU.

Mother Teresa said “The poorest of poor are not those without food, clothes and shelter but those who lack Love & Care”

There is a Mohit in your neighbourhood.

Pick the call that you left unattended. Return the call that you had to shorten due to your constraints.

Never underestimate those five minutes you spend for others.

TRUTH

As a child I got everything I wanted. Toys, Chocolates, Bi-cycle, Cricket Bat, Video games… u name it.. But all of them didn’t come just like that.

I had to pay a price - A PRICE THAT WENT ON TO BECOME A PART OF MY VALUE SYSTEM

My parents gifted me those goodies during the moments of truth i.e. whenever I spoke the truth. Well, it was there way of teaching me that “Truth always Triumphs” :)

Since then I grew up thinking it pays to speak the truth, only to realize in the real world I had to pay huge price for speaking the truth.

In college, our gang had the custom of dining out during b’day of our friends. Soon into the dinner, we spoke a lot… all about college girls :P . During one such time, the wicked friend of mine bowled me over with his question. Who is your crush in class?. For a moment I didn’t know what to say. I had to choose among so many girls ;) Realizing I was in the company of my dear friends, I threw two names in their chronological order. Guess what? I was mocked, teased and eventually become a laughing stock for all my friends throughout the college days. 

“What big deal? It’s just a trivial issue”, you may feel.

It is a trivial issue but the feeling of being reprimanded for speaking what I genuinely believed in hurt me then.

During a Job Interview, the interviewer asked, “Do you support capitation fees for education”? I said “YES”. With completing all the rounds successfully I was all set to work in my dream company. But the happiness didn’t last long as I was rejected from qualifying for the job. A strong supporter of merit based education system; the interviewer had every right to dislike my answer. But I felt that it should not have been the sole criteria for disqualifying me from the job.

Again paid a huge prize for speaking the truth.

Over the years I have lost many prized possessions because I choose to speak the truth.

Inspite of many losses I choose to speak the truth, after all what’s wrong in calling a spade a SPADE.. 

I speak the truth because it is that VALUE SYSTEM that has brought me to what I am today. 

I never intend to preach anyone through my blogs yet I’m tempted to say this…

I urge you to have a VALUE SYSTEM for your life and follow it rigorously. It can be as simple as not getting angry to never taking a bribe.

When life is getting ready to test your character listen to your VALUE system and act accordingly. 

You may not win all the battles but you will be happy all day because unlike many YOU HAD THE COURAGE TO STAND UP & SPEAK THE TRUTH..and of course you didn’t have to remember what you said ;)

Leadership lesson from Toastmasters

Being a Human Resource professional, one thing that I never failed to do was to talk to my employees about great leaders who inspired the masses to perform well. I used to prepare PowerPoint presentations filled with leadership lessons stirred by great leaders like Dr. Abdul Kalam, Jack Welch and Mother Teresa. Every month my presentations changed but the desired behavioural changes was never evident among my employees. With all doors closed, I quizzed myself if there was any other way to make my employees become good leaders.

That was the time when I took over as the President of Chennai Toastmasters Club and in the next six months I got the answer to my question.

Initially I thought leading a club that brags of more than 80 members and great speakers was always a cake walk.

Soon I was in for a shock. True to the words, that the devil is in the detail, going through the member’s achievements, all I could see was, there were only handful of good speaker’s and evaluators who have played the dominant role and ensured that the quality of club meetings was kept high. We were at times made to feel handicapped by their absence.

That was the time my team identified few good talents who with little encouragement and opportunity had the potential to become great speaker’s and evaluators.
Those talents always existed in Chennai toastmasters but somehow, somewhere along the path they were not made to unleash their potential.

We as a team spoke to them, encouraged them, and helped them to perform better. Things weren’t as easy as I have penned down. People did fail at times. They wanted to throw their hands up and surrender. But we knew that those failures were needed to create better future for the club. Since then, whenever member’s failed, we lend them the helping hand, encouraged them and provided them the opportunity to excel.
That’s how we created better speakers, better evaluators and better leaders in Chennai toastmasters club.

The greatest leadership lesson I learnt from my term was that “Identify talent; provide them the opportunity and conducive environment to excel. Soon you will be amazed by their achievement”.

Today I no longer prepare leadership presentations for my employees instead I put them on the job, create a conducive environment and encourage them to perform well.
Thanks to toastmasters movement which taught me a leadership lesson that I never learnt even during my management lectures.

It’s pleasure waiting for you

It was 8:30 AM. I walked into South India’s biggest Conglomerate Corporate office to close a deal. My appointment was at 9 AM and felt glad that I maneuvered through Chennai traffic to make it on time. I glanced through few newspapers to while away some time. It was 30 minutes past 10 AM and I was still waiting.. After some time I looked at the watch, now it was almost 12 noon. By now, I had gone through all the papers lying in the reception and was restless. I was totally frustrated with the client for making me wait for almost 3 hours.

I wondered “What pleasure do they get by making me wait?”

That was a Eureka moment for this blog… I have waited for so many things in life and all those waitings have always been a pleasure…

In school, it was a rule that one of the parent must come to pick their children at the stroke of bell. While everyone would leave by 4 PM, my mother always comes late because of her work. She had to transit 2 buses to reach school from my home. The wait for her arrival was filled with irritation then. I used to stand on my feet, putting my head outside the door with my eyes wide open anxiously yearning to see my mother strode to pick me up.. Today as I reminisce that incident I sincerely feel it was a pleasure waiting for my mother :)

During college, we the notorious eight were thick and thin of all the happenings. We used to bunk classes together, play volleyball, strike the snooker balls in Potshot and hang around the city. It was during the 2nd year that one of the naught eight was celebrating his birthday and he treated us in a star hotel. We spoke on various topics which included gossips and confessions {Wonder how all the topics we discussed were always centered around women ;) }.. Over a period of time this star hotel dinner treat was a ritual and we enjoy it to an extent that it cannot be explained but only experienced. Today sitting in this part of the world, I am waiting for one of that dinner to happen. I am not sure if it would be logistically possible for all of us to assemble at one place now but the mere thought of it gives me immense pleasure :)

No two persons are similar, even if so it’s difficult to find them. But Meshak and I have always thought alike atleast in most instances: P. Though being classmates in school, we befriended each other when studying in different colleges. Soon we became close and this 2011, we are celebrating a decade of friendship. Those countless coffee day outings, rambling across besant nagar beach, Cup corns and self depreciating comments we made, ofcourse not to forget those bird-sighting sessions. :) Wow!!! Just too good. He left to US in 2008 and is yet to step into India. Most probably he might be coming this year end for his marriage and I am anxious to see not just him but also his marriage. Surely this wait is a pleasure indeed :)

No one passes by without making an impression in our life. Divya is one among them who has always impressed me. The lady with a sparkling smile, simple yet scintillating dressing sense and a level headed person who always takes genuine interest in me will forever remain special in my life. It took sometime for us to break the ice, but once done we enjoyed each others company. Those little misunderstandings, witty humour sense, exchange of thoughts, little fights, dinner at restaurants and long drives have always strengthened our bonds of friendship. It’s been 4 years since she went for an onsite assignment and I am already feeling her vaccum. I am waiting for her arrival and needless to say this wait is also a pleasure :)

Friends, it’s 1 PM and I hear that the meeting is called off. I am terribly upset with my client yet I think I should thank him for making me wait all along because he has given me a chance to sit back and realize all those worthy wait’s which I cherish and look forward in life.

{Client gives a cock and bull story for not meeting me today}

I shook hands with him and left the place telling “It’s pleasure waiting for you”

What lies behind the Mask?

A beautiful woman clad in dark red saree, hair decorated with jasmine and a bindi that occupied half of her central forehead walked down the street after enjoying the company of her boyfriend, since her husband was out of town. Seeing her, a person told his friend, “Dude, Have you ever watched goddess lakshmi walking down the street? If not, look at her. Wow! I wish to have a wife like her.. infact I wish she was my wife”

At the same time, a girl was fighting against a man who tried to rape her. She fought with a conviction…used the sand, pebbles, few wooden sticks left in the sea shore to save herself from this butcher, in the process she was drenched in the sea water.

Watching this girl walking down the road with the Jeans and white tops that was totally drenched, the same person told his friend, “Dude, Look at this bitch. She is returning after enjoying the day with her boyfriend. I pity her husband”

Friends, like those poor chaps, how many times we judge people just by their outer look. So many times we form opinions just by people’s appearance, structure, the way they speak, clothes they wear, in the manner they carry themselves and other extrinsic characters. We perceive only their face value and never try to see what lies behind the mask.

I was in a similar situation today and told myself, “Share your thought with all your friends :)”.. and that’s why I decided to pen down this post :P

Letter to Prime Minister on Corruption

This letter is nothing short of a far cry of a common man who still believes that a Government of the People, by the people and for the people will not bring his confidence down.

When I went to school, people talked about corruption in terms of thousands, when I entered college it was talked in lakhs, few years later it was in crores and today we see corruption interms of few lakh crores.. I wonder if we need another Ramanujam to invent new number systems for representing the corruption levels in our Country.

Your government won extraordinary elections in 2008 and people who termed you as a “Weak Prime Minister” were defeated. Everyone from Corporate houses to Common man rejoiced your victory with an only belief that India’s Aam aadmi will shine thanks to Mr. Clean occupying the Prime Minister Chair.

The original thought of Left sitting in the opposition, meant that the minimal interference in policy making will take India to higher levels. Within 3 years of occupying this office, Government has indeed taken India to higher levels in terms of mishandling the corrupts and corruption cases.

India scored 3.3 in the World corruption index on a scale of 0 – 10 (0 being the Most corrupt and 10 being corrupt free). We see the Raja’s, Kalmadi’s, Khan’s and other culprits having a free run. Needless to say they are only the last face and big fishes have had their share in the looting. If not for the backing, these guys will not have audacity to act on their wishes.

Today the corruption level is very high that a common man doesn’t understand the figures involved in it. 2G Spectrum Scam has had its money share spread across various beneficiaries like Politicians, Policy Makers, Corporate houses, Brokers etc. I strongly believe that without the support and backing of Big names, Raja could not have done this. Amidst all these fiasco, all we hear from you is no wrong doing in 2G spectrum allocation. What an irony Prime Minister? I strongly believe that you are a person with impeccable integrity; however hiding facts is equivalent to committing a crime. Your silent is a serious concern for the people of this country.

A leader may be of high integrity but if he doesn’t look into the anomaly in his sub-ordinates work, it’s equal to not discharging your duties properly. Do you want to be remembered for that?

Deccan Herald has released a news item on January 9th 2011 which quotes that the original estimate for CWG was Rs. 618 Crores. However approximately Rs. 60000 Crores were spent (Almost 100 times the original estimates) only to see the foot-over bridge collapse in the CWG venue on the eve of your visit. It’s an irony that a bunch of jokers brought the country of billion people to its knees. Its even sadder to not that all accused in CWG are out in bail and enjoying life lavishly.

To me, it sounds weird that in a country were strict actions is taken against a peon/clerk for accepting bribes in the order of 1000’s, why is that culprits who loot in crores are left free.

Inspite of having the support of other countries, why isn’t your Government taking any action against people who have parked billions in tax havens? Why isn’t Hasan Ali Khan arrested and interrogated? I fear that before even the action is taken the individual might move the money from his bank accounts. What is your Government doing on this issue?

It’s unfortunate to note other instances like Adarsh housing scam, S-Band Deal, P J Thomas appointment issues, Scam in bullet proof procurements (Remember the bullet proof that failed to save Hemant Karkare?)

I don’t want to see myself as problem highlighter but solution giver. Find below few points for you to ponder over,

1. Our law is framed in such a way that a person is innocent until he is found guilty. It’s high time we redefine it as “a person is guilty unless he is found innocent”.
2. Let his/her passport along with their kin’s be confiscated
3. All bank accounts of the accused and beneficiaries be freezed
4. If found guilty, all his material wealth be confiscated by the Government
5. Any Educational degree (Indian or Foreign) obtained by his/her kith and kin be deemed invalid.
6. They should be deemed ineligible to register any property or buy wealth in his/her and their descendant’s name.
7. They should not be allowed to hold any post in future
8. They should be declared ineligible for any benefits that may arise out of their stature during their tenure.
9. They should not be allowed to start any business ventures in future.

This may sound ridicule but somehow I feel these types of harsh punishments will help to reduce the corruption in this Country. Fear of Punishment is required today to save the country from selfish pythons.

Prime minister, you were instrumental in avoiding the collapse of Indian Economy in 1991. You came up with bold decisions and drafted new policies that orchestrated India’s Growth story. After 2 decades, we are today in need of similar bold decisions and new policy to eradicate corruption. I may not be competent to advice but I wish to tell you this, Please do not succumb to coalition politics pressure, we don’t see you as a politician. Listen to your inner conscience, fix the urgent needs of the country.. Else step down. Don’t allow, history to remember you as a person who derelict the voice of billion Indians.

Remember “India is not suffering due to the violence of many people but due to the silence of few people like you”

Evolution

“You are a tough nut to crack man” my friend said with genuine interest on me…

I have been contemplating over that comment of hers for sometime now…

I am not just happy because it came from her but I feel really proud of myself in the way I have evolved over the last 5 years… Disappointments, betrayals, hurt, Cheating, Embarrassments, back-stabbing – Every time tears roll down my eyes, I asked God “Why me?”.. I seek answers from my friends, loved one’s, well-wishers, self-help books, even under the bottle of whiskey ;) Little did I know the answer lies within me. I recognized, all that made me cry converges to one point.. “MY EXPECTATIONS WERE NOT MET”

That was a Eureka moment. Probably a revelation too.. I realized that expectations led to disappointments. Since then I make it a point not to have any expectations from anyone, even my akin.

At the same time, I ensure that I am available for anyone when they need me, to share their joy with me, to vent out their emotions or to lean & cry because I strongly believe that the poorest of poor are those who don’t have companion to share their feelings. I ensure no one is left poor in my backyard.

You might think “What big deal? It’s a small things”.

All I wish to say is, in life, SMALL THINGS MEAN A LOT :)

Spice to my Life...

I had spent most of my childhood days in the sea shore. Simply because of two reasons, one it was close to my place and the second was you don’t need money to visit the sea shore..

Building sand castle, shooting balloons and lapping against the waves have always fascinated me. I was even more enchanted to see the flights flying high in the sky above the sea and land. My bro and I use to gape at the flight like a shooter whose eyes are fixed to the target. We jumped, shouted and waved our hands at the flight thinking that someone would respond… In short, the world came to a standstill when I see a flight..

Though the flight journey was making travel easier, exciting and enjoying I couldn’t yearn for it since they were expensive.

Needless to say Flying was a far reaching dream then..

But today, thanks to toastmasters that gave an opportunity to accomplish my age old dream..

I was very proud to take those small little steps to step into the aircraft. Like any other first time flyer I glued to the window seat and seeked the help of my co-passenger to fix the seat belt.

First thing I felt doing then…Guess What? To update my facebook status.. Searched for the internet enabled computer.. Damn!! Air hostess said they don’t have one and smiled. Oh boy! That smile was more than enough to kill the male community in large…

The flight aligned to its trajectory and pierced into the sky.. I was experiencing a feeling that could not be explained in words.. I fixed my eyes to the window and was gazing at the land beneath. Wow! It was a fascinating view of mother earth. Just when I thought there cannot be a better sight, I saw the sun rise from the skies.. For the lack of better word, all I would like to say is it was a zenith of natural beauty.

I was distracted from enjoying the nature’s beauty by this snoring “sound” sleep of my fellow passenger.. I contemplated if not for this spectacular nature’s beauty what else could interest him…

We landed in Mumbai and as I looked back at the flight I traveled with a lot of pride, my friend put his hands on my shoulder and asked “How was your maiden flight journey”…

I said “SPICEJET ADDED SPICE TO MY LIFE” :)

Confession

Diwali is a festival of lights that symbolizes the victory of Good over Evil. It is on this day Lord Rama returned to Ayodhya after defeating King Ravan…

Today we are surrounded by so many many evils in the name of corrupt Politicians, Beaurocrats and ills from other section of society who are bringing shame to this country and worst is, I fear if India will ever change..

1,39,652,00,00,000 – This is the official number quoted by the Auditor General of India to the Supreme Court with regard to the amount relating to the irregularities in the 2G Spectrum Allocation. It’s been almost a year since CBI took over the case and no progress has been made to punish the guilty inspite of many evidences that CBI claims to have. The corruption charged minister still enjoys all privileges of his position and is taking all of us for a ride.

In organizations, when someone is accused of wrong doings they are “suspended pending enquiry” meaning they are relieved from their duties until they come clean. Why isn’t the same applicable to Politicians? A Minister charged with corruption in all possibilities may misuse his position to get rid of the case. Instead it will be wise if they get out of the thrown and prove themselves.. If they do so, people will surely bring them back.

Telecom Minister says he hasn’t done anything wrong but practiced what is predecessors did?.Bull Shit… Mr. Raja, Would you sell your property for the price that was fixed in 2001? Your answers are testimony to your incompetence and inefficient way of running your department.

Moving on, a country with billion people was literally brought to its knees by OC of CWG. Indeed CWG has turned out to be wealthy game for few people. Asusual the probe is on which isn’t time bound and I’m sure the culprits have the option of free run.

Lastly, there has been lot of kidnap cases. Offlate a 10 year old girl was molested and murdered. Day before that, 2 siblings were kidnapped and murdered. I wish these culprits are hanged to death in public without any mercy after the time bound proceeding. No humanitarian consideration should be shown to such inhuman acts.

Instead we are admitting such culprits in hospital, saving his life, conducting the proceeding for year’s together inturn wasting our resources including public money.

I believe Harsh, Immediate and Major Punishments like what it is in the Middle East should be given to these sorts of criminals because the fear of punishment is the only thing that will drive our system clean.

I confess that I am penning down these thoughts with a sense of disgrace, guilt and shame that I am not able to do anything about this singularly but sincerely hope that somewhere someone will rise up to win these evils and I will be glad to join hands with them..

Why few people wish to stay Single :)

Until now I have come across atleast half a dozen ppl who wish to stay single throughout their life.. and this blog is as a result of the conversations(Oops! Sorry. Read it as confrontations) I had with them..

Disclaimer: Utmost care has been taken to avoid male chauvinistic remarks, however any comments that may seem to be biased towards a gender or section of society are not intentional.

While there may be various reasons for one to take this extreme step(Staying Single), my focus is on few reasons that seem to be very absurd to me..

Broken Relationship: While it’s normal for people to get into a relationship, many times this relationship fails to meet the long term commitment i.e. Marriage. I have come across ppl who fall in love deeply, madly that he/she goes to any extreme to make their loved ones happy. Sadly this happiness is short-lived and many times these relationships are treated only as passing clouds by few who do not value the love that’s showered upon him/her.

When they hit reality it looks as though the world has come to a standstill and he/she starts detesting people/world simply because they aren’t able to accept the fact about their failed relationship. While this is normal to many, only few accept the reality while the rest feel that it’s no longer normal life for them and thinkfeel it’s not possible for them to love or accept any other man/woman in their life.

My Comment:

1. If you are the reason for the broken relationship, it’s good that you understand the mistake. That’s the first step toward building bridges in a relationship. Better late than never, speak to your partner and apologize if required without any ego.. Afterall its your life.. Especially for guys, you don’t have to feel ashamed for falling at her feet, since that’s going to be the way of life after marriage ;)

2. Now what if the fault is on your partner and he/she doesn’t want you in their life anymore? I feel there is no point in shedding tears for someone who doesn’t deserve it. Though easier said than done, move on with life.. Take a break, Go for an holiday, Meet your friends, Speak out with your akin, Rejoin those dance classes which you always wanted to attend, colour your wall like an Michael Angelo’s art.. Main idea is to keep yourself busy in something or the other so as to divert your attention. Who knows? You might find your better half in the dance class, music festival or in your holiday.. I can vouch for this..:)

Personal Experience: Many times we come across bad marriages within our family and friends circle. Barring love, inspite of matching horoscopes, background checks and hefty sum as dowry, many arranged marriages fail. Over a period of time we hear 2,3,4 marriages that fail due to various reasons. These external experiences also have a profound impact on our decision to stay single…

My Comment:

Never let other’s experience decide your future. You may not exactly know what happened in their lives. You might have a great opinion on your friend and you thought he is the best husband material and the girl should be lucky enough to get him… But you may not exactly know how your friend handles his personal life. Friendship & Marriage are two different entity that cannot be compared.. Never form an halo effect seeing the few characteristics of your friend.. and last thing you could do is, draw his personal life as an inspiration and decide to stay single. You should be insane. Please friends do not do this..

All said and done what’s important to keep a happy, blissful marriage life going? To answer in one word “COMPROMISE”. I believe nobody is perfect and we have to understand & accept those imperfections to lead a healthy marriage life.

Finally, no amount of reading romance books is equal to the act of falling in love. Similarly you need to get married and enjoy life. It’s always special to live life for that one special person who will not only share your joy, sorrows, happiness but also your credit card.. Lolz.. Kidding ;)

Best Kiss I ever received..

After playing cricket in the scorching heat, I returned home sweating profusely. I felt disgusted by the heat and told myself “Oh God! I’m stinking”. But at my doorstep my mother embraces me, wipes the sweat in my face with her pallu and kisses on my cheek.

Wow! Those Childhood days were amazing..

While this scene is common to everyone in the childhood days seldom (Not common) it happens now. And that’s exactly I am baffled about.

Why don’t they see us as child even after we grow up….I think the reason in my case is that my parents thought I was too old to get such a reception today. Rather they were conditioned to think so by "ME"…

Yes! Once I entered my adolescent age, kiss from my Girl friend was for more interesting than from my parents. Whenever they tried to hug me, I tell them “Ma.. I’m 17 years, don’t treat me like a child..”, “No Appa, I’m going out with my friends, cannot come with you”..

By those words I slowly kept moving away from them thinking I should behave like an adult and shouldn’t entertain those acts…

All went well until I went to work.. 6 days work, even before you get ready to relax on Sunday your holiday is over…. No longer meeting friends, no night outs, no birthday parties, No time to meet your relatives.. Life became mechanical.. I was entangled with daily routine work and felt a vaccum in my life.. I wanted to go back to those lovely days where my parents showered the unconditional love on me..

Today all I had to do was to ask my mom.. and there it comes.. Kiss on my cheek after almost 10 years… Wow!! This will remain as the best kiss I have ever received in my life :)

Special Person in your life

Rajesh, who is the most special person in your life?

I was flummoxed with this question. So many people’s name ran through my mind. My Parents who even today stand as a rock of our family, My teachers who moulded a rough charcoal into a polished diamond (Tht’s me ;) ), My Professors who helped me to sharpen my management skills, my mentor who coaches me on life skills, my friends who are an integral part of my life, My love who made me realize that it is still possible to forgive a person who hurt you..
So many names cris -crossed my mind…

{Mobile Ringing}….

As soon as I saw the name on the mobile phone I realized who that special person in my life was.

Yes. Many people walk into our lives, serve their purpose and walk away but only very few remain with us through out our life. They are the one’s on whom we drench our happiness, Joy, Love, affection, Sorrow, Anger and all other emotions.. They will stand by us during our bright sunny day’s while offering their shoulder for us to lean during our downhill.. Whatever we say, they won’t react but respond. They might be far away from us yet they will have an eagle’s eye on us & monitor the progress we make in our life…both professionally and personally.

I am sure you all will also have a special person in your life but the biggest question is how to identify them.

Well, Very Simple… If their name flashing on your mobile phone brings a smile on your face then they are the special person in your life. :)

Cherish the lovely moments with them.. Its Priceless!!!

The Gas Tragedy

I never wanted to voice my opinions on this issue but recent developments made me to rethink my decision. I’m writing this not as a Politician or Indian or American but only on the humanitarian grounds and on compassion I have towards my fellow human beings.

Everything takes time in India and 25 years of waiting for justice is no exception to it.

Leak of Methyl Iso-cynate gas from the Union Carbide plant has not just succumbed 25,000 people to death but has caused generations of ill effects on the health of people living in Bhopal. Off Springs are born with birth ailment, Permanent damage has been caused to the flora & fauna, people around the factory inhale air that’s poisonous even today.

I would like to voice over my opinions on different sections of this society.

Politicians

We are hearing a no. of stories on the way the issue has been handled. People who never opened their mouth all these days are letting out sensational news that causes a great concern. Pilot, Taxi driver, Home secretary and District Collector are coming out and saying on record that they were ordered to pave way for Anderson’s escape.

Infact I was dumbstuck to see a footage showing policemen opening the gate and saluting Warren Anderson, 3 days after he was released on bail. For sure many Government departments have tirelessly worked & lobbied to ensure Warren Anderson’s exit from India.

All I would like to ask these politicians is how on earth you can protect the interest of a billion people if you cannot account responsibility for the death of masses? You guys have pledged 25,000 lives who died and 50,000 people who still live with permanent ailments and many generations to come to protect your own interests. These Sufferers are the Aam Aadmi’s who feature in your election manifestation. How is the pain caused to them justified?

Media

All news channels carry some message on this tragedy ever since the verdict came. While it is good for media to bring out issues to catch audience attention, the same media are also responsible for infinite pain. “GROUND ZERO – BHOPAL”, “24 HOURS in BHOPAL” and other stories which cover the victims of the gas tragedy will only make things worse. Questions like How did you feel after the gas leak? How much compensation you received? How many people in your family died in the gas leak?, will only rekindle the trouble, tragedy & trauma they have gone through and cause endless pain to them. Asking such questions is like asking a father who lost his son “How do you feel now?” Oh Please for all the Bakra’s, Rajdeep’s, have some mercy on the people of Bhopal.

When will you guys stop making sensation out of other’s sufferings?

People of Bhopal

While I salute your perseverance and patience for justice, I believe it’s high time we give new dimension to our way of fighting for justice. I may be a fool who is influenced by some radical thinking but I think extreme measures like boycotting the elections and letting the governance know that our fundamental rights/needs are not taken care off will send strong signals to people who govern us. Time has come where these Pandits of Politics cannot take us for granted. Mahatma Gandhi said “Be the change you want to see” and I believe if things have to change we need to take drastic steps.

Justice Department

25,000 Lives = 2 Years of Jail (or) Rs 1 Lakh Fine.

How is this justified?

All said and done, it’s just a matter of time before the attention shifts from this tragedy to some other news. It may be FIFA World Cup, Elections, Oil Price, Food Inflation or Aishwarya Rai. Who Knows?. We people have to blame ourselves for this short term memory loss that we suffer from.

Parenting

I have always wondered if the Art of Parenting can be preached, practice or performed by any parents. After due diligence I have come to the conclusion that Yes! It is possible. But most of our parents are so much engaged in meeting the daily needs of the family that they forget the importance of parenting. This subject is close to my heart and so did I decide to pen down my thoughts.

Viktor Lozhkin and Yana Mikhailova were detained by the local police authorities for investigation purposes. Reason being not for charges of Murder, not for assaulting a women, not for peddling drugs, not for burglary, no no not even for theft. Then Why?
Viktor and Yana were detained on suspicion of neglecting their 5 year old child Natasha who was locked in a room with dogs and cats for several years causing her to behave like an animal. She laps her food, drinks with the tongue and walks on all four. So what big deal? It’s just one off incident which cannot be generalized Rajesh. If you think so, then we need to go back and check if it is really a one off incident.

• In December 2008, Lyokha was found in the forests of central Russia. He had been living with a dozen of wolves and has inculcated wolf-like behaviors and reactions.
• In 2007-08, Danielle Crockett was rescued from Florida. She was found locked in a room and deprived of human interaction for the first seven years of her life. She is currently undergoing human conditioning.
• In 2007, Amy was found in the mountains of Bulgaria where she had been raised by dogs. She doesn’t understand the native language and is not able to exhibit human emotions.
• And way back in 1920, eight year old kamala and 18 month old Amala were reportedly rescued from a wolf’s den in West Bengal.

Officially documented feral children’s numbers is almost 130 around the world out of which 27 cases have been reported in India since 1900’s. But the most alarming news is that the act of neglected parenting is unofficially at record high in urban India. It’s happening in our city, our street, our neighbourhood and our home. This is not an exaggeration.

Thanks to the rising standards of cost of living, double income families are at record high today, result being parents have little time to spend with their children. Children are sent to school at the age of 3. What do they teach the children in Pre.K.G? Nothing but children spend time playing with one another. Do you really have to go to school to play? Didn’t you and I play with our friends in our childhood days? Isn’t that possible at home sweet home? It is possible but parent’s feel that they cannot afford the time due to financial pressures at home.

Look at the Ideal child’s schedule. It goes like 9 AM to 4 PM at school, 4-6 Tuition classes, 6-8 will probably be a dance class or music class or some other classes. Parents encourage their children to take up extracurricular activities like never before. Wonderful, kudos to all the parents. But there is selfishness in this generosity shown towards children. Main objective is to engage their children with some task or the other until they get back home. This is a bitter truth.

Even before the school bus arrives parent’s company bus is at their doorstep. What an irony? Everyone in the family holds a duplicate key which facilitates them to come and go whenever they feel. To me greatest invention is Refrigerator & Microwave oven because it serves me left over dinner for breakfast and left over breakfast for lunch. I’m tired of eating re-heated food over and over again. I can’t imagine a life without Refrigerator and microwave oven.

I’m not accusing parents for what they do. I understand they do it to help their children live a better life than what you and I have today. But the ripple effect of discarded love will not serve the intended purpose. We all slog everyday as though we are not going to live tomorrow. We believe that money would bring in happiness at home. I think it is a greatest myth. Money would create an environment conducive for Happiness. But real happiness comes from spending quality time with your loved ones.

If these situations continue there will be a time in future when father, mother and children will be on a conference call to discuss the time to meet over for dinner. There will be a time when your children would respond with a bizarre look as you introduce your blood relations to them. Because the concept of nuclear family has broken the bridge of family interaction & closeness. This is not a hypothetical statement. This has already happened in western world and the day is not far away before it happens here.

I hope my thoughts would trigger your minds. I would be happy if even one among you realizes spending time with family is very important. Remember friends, you are a reason for your child’s existence in this world. Give them life by spending time with them because those few hours you spend playing with them, appreciating them for what they are, listening to whatever they have to say, can have a great impact in both you and your children’s life.

Points to note before you Quit your Job

Signs of economic revival are being welcomed by the Government & Corporate Community around the world. Employees who settled for ZERO HIKES, No Promotions and in certain cases taking voluntary pay cuts to avoid layoff are updating their resumes and getting ready to move ahead. For all you guys floating around your resumes in Job Portals & with Ex-Bosses, Previous Employers and Friends consider the following factors before you quit your present Job.

1. Learning Opportunities – Adding experience to years is better than adding years to your experience. Read the previous line carefully. Does the organization provide enough learning opportunities to you? Do you have access to Journals / Internet to keep you updated on the latest developments in your Domain space? Does your organization giving importance to training? It is very important to learn, unlearn & relearn and keep ourselves abreast on the knowledge front.

2. Empowerment – As we move up the Ladder we are driven by the Power of Authority. You would want to take decisions of varied nature even though they are not related to the Organizations financial performance. For example bring out a change in the way of working, Developing/Modifying the Policies and Procedures, Granting leave to your sub-ordinates etc. Are you empowered to take such decisions? Magnitude of decision making doesn’t matter until Empowerment exists in some form or the other.

3. Voice out your Opinion – You may be working in a company which boasts of best of policies & procedures. You understand that the Policies and Procedures should have flexibility. You feel that you have not been treated fairly in the organization. Are you able to voice out your opinion to your Boss? Are you free to highlight your concerns to your Boss? You may not see any outcome but at least you would feel better that you let out your emotions freely. Believe me withholding your views creates a frustration which will do no good to you.

4. Flexibility – Most of your personal work would take a maximum of 1 - 2 hours. However you would not want to talk a full day leave from office. Are you allowed those two hours permission to complete your bank work, attend a family function, reach your loved ones who suddenly fall ill or to complete your household work.

5. Work Life Balance – Extended work hours for completing a Project, Preparing a Proposal, Meeting the deadline is unavoidable. See to that it doesn’t become a way of life. After all there is a life beyond your cubicle and the conference room. Maintaining a work life balance is imperative to taste success in both Personal & Professional life.

The above list is not exhaustive but it includes few factors which I feel are important. Before you quit an organization list down the Pro’s and Con’s of your Present Employer and Future Employer, see if it makes sense to move to a new employer and then take a decision. Do not see compensation has the only driver to quit. Remember it’s always wise to forego short term benefits for long term gains.

Wishing you a great year ahead! :)

Life's Mantra

60 year old man resting his arm on his wife (Hopefully:) ) and sharing light moments, Newlywed couple enjoying their private moments in public place, lovers playing in the sea water and two guys expressing their affection for each other.

I noticed Shravan noticing all those acts with a lost look. I sat beside him and could sense that something was wrong. He wasn’t the same person he used to be. Those rib tickling jokes, his sense of humour, pulling friends leg was all missing. He thought how good it would be to have a company like those lucky one’s he was looking at. Be it in any form-friend, lover or wife. He said “Machi, I experience lot of emotions like Happiness, Joy, Love, Sadness and Anger in my life yet I don’t know to whom I can express it. It feels really bad when you don’t have anyone to lean and cry out your emotions machan…..”. Soon I came to know his problem. He was feeling aloof.

Often while chasing our own paths in life, we forget to catch up with our old friends or likeminded persons-no more birthday parties, no more night stays, no more discussions on so called forbidden acts and no more chatting over the phone till midnight for nothing. In doing so, we detach ourselves from those selfless creatures who brought smile to our face, who stood by us during all the odds we faced and now complain of not having a company to spend time with.

I told Shravan “Before you desire, spare your shoulder for others to lean, who knows your purpose of life may be complete with them. There are certain things in life that happens for a reason. Don’t question its logic. Just move on with life and be like water that embraces everything that comes by. Good, Bad, Cheat, Hate, Disasters, Tragedy or Betrayal. These all are a sojourn. Tell yourself “This too shall passby… Eventually you will experience serenity in life. This is a time tested technique that works perfectly well. That’s the secret of my life too.”

Love deeply & passionately, you might get hurt but that’s how you live life completely!

AO – Next Frontier of Growth in Tamil Cinema

I don’t remember the last time I woke up before the sunrise. But today I got up at around 5 in the morning, took bath and got ready. Reason, not being Pongal. I was leaving home to watch the first day first show of the most awaited movie “Aayirathil Oruvan”.

Being an ardent fan of Selvaraghavan, there is always something in his movie that attracts me to the theatre. Be it unfolding a love, describing the delicate relationship between a boy and a girl or scanning through a life of a gangster, Selva is exemplary in showcasing it to the audience.

A lot of hype has been created by the film fraternity & media about this movie especially because it is a Selvaragavan’s movie and the numerous delay's in releasing the movie. Now I have all the more reason to get excited about watching this film.

I would like to move away from the storyline and talk about the few aspects of the movie. First and foremost is CINEMATOGRAPHY. The camera angles and the lightings are brilliant. The mountains, Thick Forests, Streams and Deserts of Jaisalmer are all a visual treat.

Second is the ART DIRECTION. Most of the film depicting the lives of the Chola Dynasty has been shot using the sets. These sets look so real that it takes us to their world.

Third is the SHADES used. Early mornings, late evenings, Mountains, Desert, Chola Hideouts have all been shown with great colour.

Stunts have been pictured wonderfully. I guess few sequences have been emulated from Hollywood flicks yet they are appealing.

If you shoot out a question like who is the hero of AO? In split seconds I will come up with two names. Selvaragavan & Reema Sen.

Even though the film seems to test one’s patience for 3 ¼ hours, I think selva had little control over it.

As I was dumbstuck with Selva’s daring efforts to present such film, I overheard few people leaving with disappointment. I understand perceptions are different yet I feel we need to encourage these films which takes us beyond the mundane tamil films and keeps us flummoxed every minute.. After all we all love a Titanic, 2012, Avatar for its extravaganza but simply do not appreciate Tamil Films of same magnitude(Not literally) and sensation.

Needless to say AO is one movie that belongs to the elite group of films that takes Tamil Cinema to the Next frontier of Growth.

Kudos to the entire team of AO.

The Best ever Drive

My Dad is very special to me. Today I reminisce all the selfless sacrifices he has done for me. He doesn’t drive a car, Motorcycle or even a bicycle. To put it this way, he never attempted to learn driving.

All he knew was work and me. He considered me to be his world. I recall the days when he used to carry me on his shoulders to my school which was 5 kilometers away from my house. I have always asked him to get a vehicle for himself but he refused. Not that he couldn’t afford it but for reasons unknown he never owned one.

After lot of persuasion, in the summer of 96, he got me a bicycle. No longer, I required the services of my Herculean father because Hercules MTB was there to serve me. I considered it to be the ferrari’s of the world and used to zoom across streets giving tough time to the street walkers.

One fine day, I fell down from the cycle and went home weeping. I explained whatever happened to my mother. She applied Pain balm and put me to sleep. At 1 A.M., I felt an enormous pain when someone touched my hand. It was my Father. He enquired about what happened and knowing the seriousness of the injury he didn’t wait for the dawn. He put me on his arms and marched towards the hospital which was 8 kms away for treating my fractured arm. During my stay in the hospital too, dad used to shuttle between house and hospital getting me good food. He never let my mother do those stuffs. My mom at times used to shout at my dad for being over sensitive towards me.

Even today he makes sure I’m not put into any botheration for getting his work done. I don’t know if I can refer his behaviour to be egoistic but I simply love him for what he is.

For past 25 years those legs have been working round-the-clock for me.

Today I intend to make his travel easier with this car which I have bought for him.

As I drove the car I could see smile on my dad’s face. I can make out what it means. He felt happy that I lived up to his expectations.

I will continue to do so in future too.. Love you Dad:)

Beautiful things in Life:)

If I say I wish to play hide & seek, sleep in my mother’s lap, you would feel that I am being kiddish. But for a second, give it a thought. Those were the beautiful moments we enjoyed in our life when we were ourselves. Today, our life has become very monotonous & mundane, that we don’t have time to spend with our family, friends & loved ones. So I thought to pen down few things which I consider to be beautiful in life that I am missing so much.

To me,

1. Joint Family was beautiful,
2. Playing with my dad was beautiful,
3. Dad’s food is beautiful,
4. Mom feeding me was beautiful,
5. Midnight tea was beautiful,
6. Beaches were beautiful,
7. Bird Sighting was beautiful,
8. Long chat over the phone was beautiful,
9. Speaking to the loved one was beautiful,
10. Long walk with her was beautiful,
11. College tour was beautiful,
12. College bunking was beautiful,
13. Commuting through train was beautiful,
14. Night stay was beautiful,
15. Getting drenched in rain was beautiful,
16. Snooker was beautiful and
17. Birthday dinners were beautiful,

I reminisce all these moments which had been an integral part of my life and take this opportunity to thank everyone who were part of these wonderful moments. I know those days will never come back but those memories will always be etched to my heart.

56 Tonnes in 7 days!!!

Newsprints are never tired to fill the columns with articles on Financial Crisis, recovery signals, Inflation etc.. Amidst all these reports one distinct report caught my eyes. It’s about the yellow metal. Yes! You guessed it right.

According to reports, India has consumed 52 tonnes of Gold in 7 days i.e. from October 11th to October 18th 2009. The total worth of this is somewhere around Rs.8706/- crores.

Now tell me. Where is Recession or Slowdown? :)